waiting for forever

"Get used to living in the tension"

"Be comfortable with the mystery of God."

"You think you know what you need, but you know not."

I have heard so many incredible speakers as of late and these are some of the words that I'm really digesting lately. I have found so much comfort in the Truth that God is equipping and preparing my heart for forever. For a life, as a wife, sister, daughter, YL leader, co-worker, cousin, etc.

I was reminded last night of God's Sovereignty when one of my YL girls called and talked and talked about how much she loves church and said "why would people not like church? It's SUCH GOOD NEWS!" My eyes welled up with tears just thinking about her story and how far she's come. Not long after that I ran into one of my old WL girls. She was in 7th grade when I met her and now she's a Junior. She's a junior leader in her club now and is learning the love of her Heavenly Father. I worried about her, knowing I couldn't follow up with her as I'd like. And here she is, actively involved in YL and learning how to live a life for Christ. Really!? I'm floored.

I'm super humbled knowing God has chosen me for a life of ministry alongside Brit. I look around us at couples in ministry and hear about the struggle and the brokenness of working with people and it's intimidating; but it's also a huge honor to know God picked us. That He could believe in us enough to think we can handle it. I mean, I don't consider myself a very strong person, but I desire too and trust God to bring me to full glory someday. 

I'm learning about trust and how when I plan away and take over, I'm shoving God out and screaming "I actually don't trust you!" It breaks my heart that I would have that attitude, but that's my heart. Thank goodness He knows that and loves me in it. Wow, I'm so undeserving!

Someone told me in the early days of dating Brit, "One day at a time" and that has really stuck with me. It's daunting to look at "forever" and think "that's a long time!" But to remember to live 

one

day

at

a

time

is way more manageable and appealing. So here I sit, waiting for forever. May I never forget to enter the rest He so faithfully promises me.